Sunday, December 28, 2014

Real Vampires: The Complete Series

Gerry Bartlett first pulled me in YEARS ago while I was still working at Borders. I was shelving/alphabetizing/shopping while working in the Romance section. At this point in time -
1) I did NOT read Romance.
2) I did NOT read Series (except for Harry Potter!)
3) I did NOT read Paranormal.

Gerry's covers pulled me in. They were so bright, fun and playful. I remember buying the 3 we had on an whim. A whim that would would start me on my paranormal loving kick which would later turn into my ridiculous love of Romance. Gerry finally ended this series for her fans with the 11th in the series, 'Real Vampires Say Read My Hips.'  She ended it with incredible grace too. Before I get into the final page, let me give you a background on the series.

1) Real Vampires Have Curves
This is my FAVORITE cover of the
whole Series! <3 td="">
2) Real Vampires Live Large
3) Real Vampires Get Lucky
4) Real Vampires Don't Diet
5) Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs
6) Real Vampires Have More To Love
7) Real Vampires Don't Wear Size Six
8) Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans
9) Real Vampires Know Hips Happen
10) Real Vampires Know Size Matters
10.5) Real Vampires Take A Bite Out Of Christmas
11) Real Vampires Say Read My Hips

You get to meet Glory and the gang in the first book. Here's the blurb! 

'What - did you think all vamps were pale, thin and brooding?
Don't I wish.
Me, I just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into me, so here I am, eternally "full figured." On the plus side, Glory. St. Clair can rock a corset like nobody's business. Oh, and as for Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade? We've been on and off again for centuries, currently off. After a couple hundred years we sure know how to press each other's hot buttons - in good ways and bad. 

***Fun, right? Glory is a riot. She is currently living in Austin and running her very own vintage clothing store with a cat of fun and feisty paranormals. I shall introduce you to some. 

Blade. Geez. This Highlander is your typical "I am man - obey me Woman!" Except for the centuries under his belt. He turned his love, Glory when she was acting in Shakespeare's original works. He rocks a kilt better than NOBODY. His Da has always liked Glory, but his Ma is a different story. He has always loved her and protected her even when she pushed him away. Which leads me to...
Rafe. Rafe first appeared in book one as a Cheetos and Twinkie loving dog. He is a shifter who has been Glory's protector and the one who reports back to Blade. Somewhere along the line his relationship with Glory has blurred lines. There friendship stands the test of time, and Rafe is just the beginning of the men who are trying to have Glory stray from her sire. 
Israel Caine/Ray.Rock star. Subject of a shrine of Glory's well before he became one of the undead. This one is just TOO juicy to give away, and doesn't even get fully resolved until the end of book 11! 
Flo. and Richard. Flo is Glory's BFF and rich and flighty. A great match for a no nonsense Glory. Flo is married to a former priest, Richard who is Blade's best friend. 
Olympus. Glory finds her parents are Gods! She has brothers, sisters, parents, grandparents who can (and DO!) cause tons of trouble for this laid-back bloodsucker. 
N-V. This is Rafe's club. After he is relieved of Glory duty - he opens a club/bar for paranormals. Israel Caine frequently performs. 

Glory faces a lot in the 11 books and a novella: She finds she has a potential future daughter-in-law, weight loss guru's offering her to leave behind her size 12, being called a Blueberry, her lover having amnesia, kidnapped to Olympus, arranged marriages, Vampire hunters bombing her shop, turning her first vamp (and quickly regretting it!), demon possession and so much more! 

I haven't even begun to touch base on the Were's you met, the Gods, the Sirens, the fascinating things you learn about history and so much more. This series is chalk full of Romance, but that is so balanced with the suspense throughout every book. I loved that Gerry gave us fans the ending we all wanted, but it wasn't a book of fluff. Suspense up til the end. (Even getting to see a Blade/Ray face-off... I was giddy with excitement!) 

The book that started it ALL! 
A big FIVE STARS for the entire series. 
If you need a light series to pull you in, try the one that started my love of paranormal. 
Now let's give Gerry some LOVE. 

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